Monthly Archives: November 2015

Starcrossed Nemeses

She was like a James Bond villain:

Charismatic, certainly,

And she had a pool of sharks

And talked nonstop to me.

That suited me just fine.

I’ve also got an evil brain,

But I’m the type of bad guy

With bad teeth who gets thrown off a train.

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And I Bet They Have Cute Uniforms There

Do you want to be a wizard,

A chef or a vampire?

Do you want to train a monster

Or have power over fire?

Do you want to be a warrior

Who fights an evil horde?

Or maybe it’s that normal school

Just leaves you feeling bored.

If you want to read your family’s minds

Or own a talking cat,

Chances are, in animé,

There’s a school for that.

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Energizer Bunnies

You ever seen one of those

Human-sized dolls

For guys who want lovin’

But don’t have the balls?

I really hope they’re electric.

That’s what I’ve concluded,

‘Cause what other double-D’s

Are “batteries not included?”

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Vive L’Internet!

It’s 41 Farenheit

Outside my room.

It would be warm in Alaska

And cold in Khartoum.

In my car, my spedometer

Says 73.

That’s slow if you’re metric

But fast if you’re me.

Lots of life’s relative;

Could be good, could be bad,

But at least we agree

There’s arguments to be had!

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Obligatory Thanksgiving Poem XIVII

I’m thankful for my family

And to you, my faithful fan.

Thanks to you I made this poem

Very short, because I can.

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One Poem A Day: How Hard Can It Be?

I’m looking forward

To 2016,

Less so to the time

That comes in between,

For when the New Year

Comes rolling in

You feel able

To do anythin’.

But in 2015,

As it is right now

I’m cranking out poems

And tending electric cows.

And so in two months

I’ll be out of this funk.

For now I’ve got ice cream.

Hope you enjoyed this junk.

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Full Moon

I heard yo’ mama’s missing.

Where she’s gone is rather dull.

Let’s just say the moon was hungry

But tonight the moon is full.

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