Only At My Own Jokes

Have you ever laughed so hard

You find it hard to breathe,

Your speech gets kinda slurry

And “wheeze” sounds just like “weathe,”

Your armpits start to sag a bit

And your facial hair falls out

And you say “no thanks” to cookies 

From that visiting girl scout,

Your tongue gets heavy and falls off,

Your eyeballs leak pink ooze,

You start to smell in color

And hear good things on the news?

Basically that’s what happened,

So there’s the need to stare.

I laughed that hard this morning

When I told you that I care.