If you don’t exist
Post a comment to confuse
Literal thinkers
Also, Engagement Feeds The Algorithm
Posting wrong opinions
On the internet is fun
Because you can cause outrage
That does not hurt anyone
Except those fragile people
To whom feeling offended
Is akin to the sensation
Of having one’s life ended
And, let’s be honest, people
Who are hurt by random posts
Are fun to laugh at secretly
And are targets of my toasts.
So I post this opinion
With the hope someone will read it
And share it with a sensitive friend
Whose feeble ego may just need it.
Filed under Poems
Music
Playing sixteenth notes
Is scary when you are ten…
Also, ninety-nine
Inner City Romance (Trigger Warning: Puns)
If you’re walking down the street
And peer into the gutter
And you see a man below
And your heart goes all aflutter
Know that you are not alone
And that he feels the same
And you can shout to him “Grate Scott!”
Because that is his name.
Filed under Poems
Slay The Spire Board Game Review
Want to play a game?
Three hours later we win.
A-plus Sunday night!
Filed under Poems
Four Types Of People In A Trenchcoat
Some people dress up like the past
And call it a renaissance fair.
Some people dress up like the future
And call it fashion week.
Some people dress up like the present
And they’re all just sort of there…
I don’t dress at all anymore
And just hope someone takes a peek.
Filed under Poems
The “Reality Is A Simulation” Theory Just Got An October Update
What if the zombie apocalypse happened
And humans have already died
And we’re all undead, but inside our heads
Reality’s fully denied
And we go on thinking “this burger is yummy”
When really we’re eating a brain?
It may not be true but, between me and you,
It’s a thought I just might entertain…
Filed under Poems
If You Say “Permit”, Then You Ain’t It
For some it is abortion,
Gun rights, free speech, or war;
For others, immigration
Decides who you’re voting for.
I think an underrated issue
That would influence my vote
Is your opinion on the legality
Of building your own moat.
Filed under Poems
My Response When Invited To Social Gatherings
Why and what and where and when
And tell me who are you again?
That’s great! Now I really know
Where I will never, ever go.
Filed under Poems
