Hello officer.
Beautiful day!
Wouldn’t you like
To put the pad away?
I know I was speeding,
But I can explain.
See, this car I’m driving
Began as a plane.
I was flying a mission
Over Afghanistan.
I was low on gas, thinking
“I gotta land dis, man.”
So I steered for my base
And managed to crash land
A few miles from here
On some beautiful grashland.
I didn’t want to get spotted
By the enemy, so
I disguised my busted plane
As this beat-up GTO.
But the engine runs fine
At three hundred per hour,
And for a car this size
That’s just too much power.
So please, officer
Cut this soldier some slack.
I’m far from my base
Just trying to get back.
The Daily Travesty 