Tag Archives: Humor

Theodore walked down the street

Wearing nothing but a smile.

Several people stared at him,

and several thought it was vile.

 

He grinned at children, moms and dads

And single people too.

He stuck his tongue out, licked his lips,

And knelt to take a poo.

 

Someone called the cops, they say,

‘Cause police arrived in minutes.

They chased Theo through the fray

And tried their best to pin it.

 

But towards the altercation

A tough young lad had stepped.

He said “That’s my dalmation.

He got out from where he was kept.”

 

So the police turned over Theo,

and the lad was justly fined.

That’s my tale.  Now I can see yo’

Have a dirty mind.

 

A million, trillion years ago
A youngish caveman said,
“When to a person’s head there comes a blow,
They often wind up dead.”
He hoped that other cavemen noticed
His club’s wondrous power,
As he set off, entirely focused
On seizing social power.

Yet somehow we have not evolved
Beyond this caveman’s reason.
And when problems need to be resolved
We make it hunting season.
We no longer clobber with our clubs
But kill with guns and grenades.
Wouldn’t we be happier just giving love
Over cups of lemonades?

Until we learn that violence,
While effective, is sub-par,
We’re doomed to act like cavemen, since
Instead of talking, we spar.
But there is a time for everything
And while war’s go on, we’ll fight.
So long as America, of freedom, does sing
We’ll be free, clad in blue, red, and white.

This poem turned out seriously,
A fact I am not proud of.
So cheer for our veterans quite cheeriously
And start clubbing your neighbors with love.