This poem is a preview from my upcoming book of 99 “How-To” Poems. Enjoy!
Your car won’t start?
Well, lucky you!
I envy what
You’ll get to do.
You’ll need another car
And a valiant heart.
Got both? Good!
It’s time to start.
First, get in the car
With the working battery.
Turn it on (You do that
By inserting and turning the key).
Have a friend prepare two ramps,
One on either side
Of your old dead-battery car.
Make sure they’re nice and wide.
Then drive full speed onto the ramp
And let that new car fly!
Look down, if you want, onto your old car
And pray that you don’t die.
And when you land successfully
On the other ramp, well look:
You’ve just learned to jump a car.
Aren’t you glad you bought this book?
The Daily Travesty 