Parenthood

The most important thing you do

As I parent I expect

Is naming your child in a good way,

So they will live a life that’s correct.

If your last name is “Handbasket,” don’t name your kid “Helena.”

If your last name is “Cummins,” don’t name your kid “Dick.”

If your last name is “Cox,” don’t name your kid “Maya.”

If your last name is “Shaw,” don’t name your kid “Rick.”

If you do these things, your child will be fine

As long as when your pregnant you don’t drink too much wine.