He was black, surrounded by brothers,
Unarmed and defenseless
When a white man came by
To perform something senseless:
The poor black was gutted
And served on a platter
With mediterranean food.
#BlackOlivesMatter
Tag Archives: Silly
Twilight Isn’t The Only Pacific Northwest Love Story
There once was a fellow from Sequim
And a gal who was quite into him
She said “I’m from Snoqualmie
“So why don’t you call me?”
This could be only in Warshington.
Filed under Poems
How To Get Federal Unemployment Benefits
When I said “I like my coffee
“Like my women: Sweet and black.”
My coworker decided
That was a personal attack.
She called the supervisor
Just to say she was offended
And just like that I found I was,
Like Epstein’s neck, suspended.
But now my luck has turned around
And I see that I’m blessed.
I can’t be an oppressor
If I am, in fact, oppressed.
Filed under Poems
See Also: Ant Farms
Once upon a time, some guy
Said “I know what we need!:
“A kinda boring screensaver
“We also have to feed.”
All the other townspeople
Said “That’s as good as it gets,”
And they all went out to buy themselves
Some fish to keep as pets.
Filed under Poems
#Fitness
Cookies for breakfast,
Pizza for lunch,
Twelve donuts for dinner,
But I did one crunch!
Filed under Poems
Beauty Without Photoshop
Willow, willow, don’t you weep.
Just calm upon the Earth sit.
Your loveliness has but one name:
Arb’oreal: Because you’re worth it.
Filed under Poems
Why The White House Has Five Full-Time Chefs
I shouldn’t be the president
Because when I want a snack
I go to a take out restaraunt
And microwave it when I get back.
At first that won’t seem dangerous
Until my words are these:
“I’m feeling kinda hungry… hey!
“Why not nuke some Chinese?”
Filed under Poems
Pyramids: Primeval Percussion Palaces
Before the phrase “More Cowbell”
Took the world by storm
Egyptians had a fever
And only could stay warm
By making a great replica
Of the instrument they’d dangle;
And they shouted in Egyptian
“I need some more triangle!”
Filed under Poems
It Rubs Me The Wrong Way, You Know?
Some people fear that God fellow.
Some people fear that Devil guy.
I fear the one who actually prefers
The toilet paper with just one ply.
Filed under Poems
Sir Alec Guinness, Ladies and Gents
There once was a guy named Obi
Whose surname was, weirdly, Kenobi.
Then this kid came along…
“Do you know Obi-Wan?”
And he was like “Of course I know me!”
—————————————————————
There once was a trooper, unnamed,
Who sought droids with data untamed,
But Obi’s like “Pu-lease!
“You ain’t looking for these.”
Only later trooper thought “I got gamed.”
—————————————————————
There one was a giant black guy
Who had a death star in the sky.
Obi met him one day
And was like “Ani! Hey!”
And then Obi-Wan’s like, “Guess I’ll die.”
Filed under Poems
