Any time I write a poem with a lotta letters
I get a temptation that of me can get the better:
You may have to read twice or the joke you will not get her…
Heeeeeey Macarena!
Tag Archives: Silly
Bonus: SNL Promo
Do you love comedy, but hate laughing?
Do you like shows where all the talented cast members left but you keep watching anyway?
Did you take a Buzzfeed personality test that called you “The one who sucks all the joy out of your friend group” and posted it proudly on social media with the caption “ZOMG, this is like soooooo me!”?
No?
Yeah, that’s what we thought.
Don’t watch SNL.
Filed under Uncategorized
The Worst Speech In The History Of Speeches, Maybe Ever
Roses are red.
Biden is tired.
The guy who holds his “applause” sign
Apparently got fired.
Filed under Poems
After Colonoscopy Comes Horoscopy
The nurse said “I’m Aquarius!”
The lab tech said “I’m Virgo!”
I said “I’m a Cancer!”
The doctor said “I know.”
Filed under Poems
Women Will Change You
There once was a man named Beyoncé
Who wanted to have a fiancee
But the girls were all like
“Why’s your name not like ‘Mike?’”
Now he goes by his middle name: Chauncey.
Filed under Poems
Male Black Widow Problems
Today is Friday night.
I’m with my darling wife.
We’re gonna have some crazy sex
‘Cause I am done with life.
Filed under Poems
How Much Would You Cry If You Had 17 Eyes?
There are ten-quintillion insects
In the world, we estimate
Who deal daily with the fact
They’re objects of our hate.
They’ve never read a poem
And they’ve never seen a play
And we just go and murder them
As they go about their day.
Lots of people say things:
“Love your neighbor,” “Peace not war,”
But they don’t even bat an eye
When vacuuming their floor.
I think when we begin to care
For the welfare of bugs
Humanity will finally see
The real value of hugs.
Filed under Poems
Before Chad And Karen, There Was This Guy
Just because his name is Curtis
Doesn’t mean that he is curt.
Just because her name is Cindy
Doesn’t mean that she’s a sinner.
Just because my name is Dick
Doesn’t mean I feelings hurt.
Now where, my wifey dearest,
Is my mother****ing dinner?
Filed under Poems
Love and War
Whenever Italy gets attacked
Someone must fell Rome,
Someone conquers Cicily,
Burns a Venetian home…
Yes, in an Italian conquest
These sackings are the staples
But a satisfying extra
Is somebody licked their Naples.
Filed under Poems
