As “My Little Pony” kids grow up
We must change our products, of course.
I’d like to propose a new toy line:
I call it, “My Big Ass Horse.”
It targets a new demographic
To break into a market we lack.
We’ll have all shapes and sizes of horses
In all colors, as long as they’re black.
We’ll distinguish this new product
From our competitors in this way:
These will be full-size, living horses
That you need to feed every day.
We can have spin-off products
Like “My cattle,” “my sheep,” “my mouse,”
“My dolphin,” “my armadillo,”
And, for those who like pigs, “my spouse.”
I know that this line will bring income
To our struggling toy company,
And I bring it to your attention
Because I have the inventory.
The Daily Travesty 