What I Look For In A Lady

I’d be wary of a felon

But she needn’t be a saint.

She eats food almost every day

And will very seldom faint.

She has two eyes, two nostrils too,

And her scalp is topped with hair.

Her days are always better

When she has access to breathable air.

I may sound picky when I say this

But she should have a mouth that can open.

Is there such a perfect girl?

Well, ’til we know, here’s hopin’.