My squad was pinned down
By ten-thousand Iraqis.
We stood not a chance
Against all Allah’s lackeys.
Somehow we survived
And came home from the war,
I with one right leg less
And one purple heart more.
When the big day arrived
To get my medal from Trump
The pres stuck it on,
Said “congrats on the stump!”
Now I live a life
Where I needn’t pack heat,
Where I save cash on tickets
When I buy half a seat.
People notice my injury
Although I don’t tout it.
I keep on with my life
And there’s no butts about it!
In a few years I’ll die
And they’ll speak at my wake.
“He was not and had not
“An asshole,” they’ll spake.
And then I’ll be in heaven
Or maybe in Hell.
Either way, no VA
So I think I’ll be well.
The Daily Travesty 