Tag Archives: Trump

Happy Election Day!

Today, America extends a query

To test the ever-popular theory

And forever end the debate

About whether love is stronger than hate.

We’re given two men with no virtues to note

And told it’s important to go out and vote.

One choice is to vote that you love Barron’s dad,

Or else just to vote that you think “Orange Man Bad.”

As for the white guy who’ll earn half the votes

Who creeps people out and has quotable quotes…

One guy will win, half the nation will cry,

And celebrities still won’t move to Canada… sigh.

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Then I Gave Death the “Come Hither” Look…

Whenever death may lurk nearby

And threaten you with pain

Know that if the threat is true

You’ll never watch a debate again…

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GI Average Joe: Halfass Commando

My squad was pinned down

By ten-thousand Iraqis.

We stood not a chance

Against all Allah’s lackeys.

Somehow we survived

And came home from the war,

I with one right leg less

And one purple heart more.

When the big day arrived

To get my medal from Trump

The pres stuck it on,

Said “congrats on the stump!”

Now I live a life

Where I needn’t pack heat,

Where I save cash on tickets

When I buy half a seat.

People notice my injury

Although I don’t tout it.

I keep on with my life

And there’s no butts about it!

In a few years I’ll die

And they’ll speak at my wake.

“He was not and had not

“An asshole,” they’ll spake.

And then I’ll be in heaven

Or maybe in Hell.

Either way, no VA

So I think I’ll be well.

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It Almost Begins…

Tomorrow is the fateful day

Where 45% of America shouts “hooray”

And the major event will be watching those

Who will not be watching the new Pres’s prose.

Tomorrow the meme will in the white house sit

And whether you smile or snarl or spit

You have to admit (or at least you should)

Until 2020 Twitter’s gonna be good.

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The Cold, Desserted Street: A Trump Administration Report

The road is cold and lonely,

The street is chill and bare,

And the temperature is cold

On the abandoned thoroughfare. 

The avenue’s deserted

And the frost clings to my hair

As I concisely summarize

That ice is all that’s present there.

The lane’s devoid of people

And our breath hangs in the air.

The thermometer’s relative lowness

Means to be outside few apparently dare.

The cul-de-sac is frigid

And devoid of folk, I swear.

It’s frosted and filled with people

In such quantity as those whom about this poem still do care.

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Passing The Buck: Fear For Your Future

No, you didn’t miss yesterday’s poem. There wasn’t one. Well, OK, there was, but WordPress decided you would enjoy it more if it wasn’t made public. Here’s my sarcastic apology/today’s poem.

Since I made a promise

To write a poem a day

Nothing really has gone wrong,

That is ’til yesterday.

The Internet betrayed me

By publishing locally,

And so my broken promise

Was not the fault of me.

I’m apologizing.

This is the way things go.

Maybe I’ll fix it in the future

With a wall paid for by Mexico?

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Yay Democracy!

Trying to fix politics

By working from within

Is like using a trowel

To fill the Grand Canyon in.

Alas, fixing politics

By showing up to vote

Is like taking that same trowel

To South Dakota via boat.

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