To Those Of The Feminist Persuasion, We Salute You Whether Or Not You Think It’s Necessary (Or Even Admirable For That Matter) Because We Have Fragile Egos Or A Sense Of Courtesy Or Perpetual Boners Or Something

Chivalry is the idea

That men are born to places

Where they should sacrifice their pleasure

For the sake of pretty faces.

Feminism is the idea

That men are born as assholes

And should sacrifice their pleasure

‘Cause women deserve castles.

The masculine perspective

Is one of courtesy, not necessity.

The feminine perspective

Is “don’t be nice, yet show respect for me.”

So after certain days of chivalry,

Whether or not there was a need for it,

I question the fundamental premise

That a woman cannot indeed be hit.

Now I’m not a violent person;

I’d never hit someone, regardless of adjective,

But a fruit rollup to the face or something

Could do wonders to change a perspective?

So to sum up, chivalry’s alive

Just like the naked mole rat,

Yet some people will prefer “equality”

Just like, for a pet, they’d like a housecat.


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