Hark! Hear the belch, deep throaty belch
That seems to say, “Guys, I’m ok!”
Family is here, bringing cheap beer
To young and old (or so I’m told).
Ding-dong-ding-dong: The doorbell’s song.
Another aunt? I really can’t…
One wants to say “Please go away”
They’re everywhere, breathing our air.
Family is bound to be around
And to pick fights o’er petty spites.
Merry happy jolly (insert day here)
Maybe gimme some of that cheap lite beer…
Filed under Poems
I got a dragon for Christmas,
And where my house used to be
Not a creature is stirring.
No, not even me.
See, it arrived all wrapped up
In gold wrapping paper.
I opened it, unaware
Of the upcoming caper.
Sure enough, once unwrapped
It flew into a rage,
And the dragon broke out
Of its carrying cage.
It blew fire from its nose
And gave off a roar
And it kept doing this
‘Til my house was no more.
Then it rose from the rubble
That it had created
And flew into the sky,
Its destructive urge sated.
So I lay down to sleep
Near a burnt fallen log,
And dream of next Christmas
When I’ll ask for a dog.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 