The Marital Bed

There once was a bed with a pillow

Then a wife did enter the room

And thus my one-pillow system

Began to sense its doom.

First came two big long pillows

That stretched across the bed

And did everything a pillow should

Except help rest your head.

Then came two fluffy square ones

That aren’t the same color or size

Because apparently symmetry

Is not good for a female’s eyes.

Then came that little round novelty

With a pic of my mother-in-law

And now I don’t sleep with a pillow at all,

Put my head on mattress all raw.