Tag Archives: Life

Works Cited: History, Personal Experience

I’ve been thinking lately

About a particular query:

“Does anyone know what’s going on?”

And I’ve finally formed a theory.

Here is that newfound theory

I derived from many factors:

“The ones who seem most confident

“Are dumb, or else good actors.”

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Legalize Normalcy

If you call yourself a poet

You’re judged by your degrees,

The person who you voted for,

How often you hug trees,

Whether you can rhyme things

Or use semicolons right

And, most important, whether

You have a penis or are white.

I am not a poet,

Though to you that’s no surprise.

I’d rather sleep in Saturday

Than watch the sun arise.

I do not care for wheelbarrows

On which so much depends.

I’m one of the mere commoners

Whom nobody defends.

I write, not for an audience,

But for the ones like me

Who want to dance the rain away

And feel completely free

But have to read a book about

What things are right to say,

Waiting to dance in private

Once the poets go away.

I feel like a geode,

Full of color, trapped in stone,

But thanks to anonymity

I needn’t be alone.

I can be with all of you

And hold you in my heart

By failing to see beauty

In what poets call their art.

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For Those Who Love To Laugh, Hiking, Traveling, And Food

We could’ve been a miracle

Like a bottle of lightning,

With ardor and passion

That bordered on frightening,

Two bits of a puzzle

That fate formed as one

Destined for fortune

And family and fun.

We could’ve been lovers

And best friends for life,

The textbook example

Of husband and wife.

You could’ve been my world,

My earth, sea, and sky,

If only your first message

Were more than just, “hi.”

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Comfort Blanket

When the day is over

And the lights go dark

You pull me on top of you

And let me be soft,

Let me keep you warm

Until blindness is comfortable

And dreams are safe.

When the monsters come

To feed on your sweet dreams

Through the leg you left uncovered

I offer my dream instead,

Because your dreams are precious,

Your dreams are limited,

Your dreams are fragile.

I only have one dream:

To keep you warm,

To keep you safe,

To never leave you,

And no monster can stomach that.

And when the light in the sky

And the light on your ceiling

Edge away the darkness

And welcome you back to life

I’m the first thing you feel,

The first gentle touch,

The first good morning kiss.

You think you’ll outgrow me.

You’ll pack me away

Or send me to another child,

But I only have one baby.

And when the monsters grow up

And they come for your dreams

But you’re awake and alone

You will never be uncovered.

The monsters never give up,

But I never stop dreaming,

And I hope you don’t either.

I’m here in everything.

I’m keeping you safe,

But you’ll never see me

As anything more than a blanket

Because it’s easy to believe in a blanket.

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When You Feel Invisible At Your Job

Shinji-San, as your boss

It is my job to say

I haven’t seen you working

Since at least last Saturday.

I haven’t seen you punching in,

I haven’t heard your voice,

And so I called you in today

Because I have no choice…

I’m giving you a pay raise

And your choice of special perk.

You’re a fantastic ninja

And I hope to see less good work.

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But I Have “Dreamer” On My Linkedin Profile… That Has To Count For Something

As a kid, I wanted

To win a Nobel Prize,

To heal the sick and dying,

Or to travel endless skies.

I’d live to one-hundred and twenty

And count the many ways I thrived!

This week I got excited

When my meal-prep box arrived…

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And Your 2021 Nobel Peace Prize Nominee Is…

Today I did nothing

And it was amazing!

I sat on my butt and was still.

I looked into space

And thought about eating

But lacked all the required will.

I noticed the clock

As the hours ticked by

And almost did something by caring

But I fought the urge

And then happily lapsed

Back to stillness and vacantly staring.

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Preservation of Mass

You were the light of their life,

A celestial body just for them,

But there were a billion stars

Brighter than you.

Your heart was a mountain,

Climbing to the sky,

But roads need gravel

And miners need jobs.

You were the wind and the water,

The rabbit and the fox,

The fish and the hook

And you fed them for a day.

Stars burn out,

Roads are passed by,

Winds stop blowing,

Foxes stop chasing,

And when its dark and still

And you forget what you were,

How you burned and grew

And bit and blew,

You’ll become a part of the world

You thought you were above;

A spark, a stone, a cell, a drop,

What you always were

And always did:

Matter.

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Only Monday Through Friday Though

One time I didn’t poop for a week,

So I went to the doctor for help.

He gave me two options to get me to go.

The first was a mixture of kelp

And fructose with fiber, a laxative cocktail

To force my intestines to play.

The second was working a job that I hate…

And now I poop two hours a day!

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That’s Almost As Many “Likes” As Teenagers Can Say In One Minute Without Even Trying

I’m 8 “Likes” away from 21,000

In the history of my blog.

My heart is very excited

And my soul is like a dog.

If 8 more people like my crap

I’ll finally achieve my goal

Of getting as many likes as a girl

Who posts dancing pics with a pole.

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Filed under Poems, To the Reader