Why yes indeed,
I rode my steed
To do the deed
Of rescue.
For a maiden fair
I did ride there,
My only care
To rescue.
I slayed the foe
That guards her, though
I only did so
To rescue
That stolen dame.
I would lay claim
To lass and fame
Through rescue.
The door open wide
I rushed inside
To where she does reside
To rescue.
When I did, I saw
A girl with bloody maw
Holding a chainsaw.
Now my rescue
Seemed quite in doubt.
As it turns out
Well, could you help me out?
I need rescue.
Filed under Poems
Flying to a new address
When I hear a stranger in distress.
Oh wait, I recognize that guy!
Let’s save a different passerby…
Filed under Poems
All day in the stables
Fighting straw dummies,
Shining our armor,
And tending our steeds
Preparing to rescue
Some distressing damsel
Who hasn’t a care
That we also have needs.
We wake in the morning
All strong and handsome
To work for the purpose
Of rescuing you,
But have you considered
In your captivity
That princes need rescuing too?
We put on brave faces
And ride o’er the kingdom
To locate princesses
Who’ll soon be our wives.
Thus is our duty,
Our privilege as princes,
And the entire purpose
Of our royal lives.
We wake in the morning
All strong and handsome
Thinking of ways
To be noble and true,
But have you considered
In your captivity
That princes need rescuing too?
Out broad shoulders need to be cried on.
Our arms need somebody to hold.
We need your assurance that love will be ours
When we’re fat, wrinkled, pervy, and old.
And so we will ride o’er the kingdom
With our perfectly coiffed princely do,
With the hope that we’ll save
The darlings we crave
Who know princes need rescuing too.
The Daily Travesty 