If you are called at host’s behest
To play the role of honored guest
And feel perhaps a little stressed
Then heed this wisdom I think best:
First, if you need not prevent
Your presence at the said event
Then notice how your time is spent
And be amazed how fast it went,
But if instead you wish to flee
You’re wise indeed to contact me
For ’tis amazing what you’ll see
If you, for just a moment, pee.
If urination’s not your style
Another way to leave a while
Is to enter, wave, and smile
And call out as a greeting, “Heil!”
If these two tips do not work out
Don’t underestimate a pout,
For dourness beyond a doubt
Is a fair way to thumb one’s snout.
Urine, Nazi, or be sullen:
All are safe ways to be cullen,
So brand yourself ein angsty creep
And thou shall glow from longer sleep!