The Real Monster Is The Underpaid Babysitter Who Reads This Poem To Your Kids Before Bed

Beds are safe and soft and warm

And in them you won’t come to harm.

But when you wake to pee at night

Then be harmed you may well might.

That’s why when you have to pee

Don’t get up for the W.C.

Your mattress was absorbantly designed

And I promise mom and dad won’t mind!