If I were a blue whale
I’d out-majestic you.
If I were an elephant
My trunk would go “kabloo!”
If I were a father moose
I’d step in front of your car.
If I were a Bengal tiger
I’d stalk you at the bar.
If I were a dog
I’d give you a real’ good lickin’.
If I were the neighbor’s cat
I’d bring you a dead chicken.
If I were a fearsome beast
Your heart, I’m sure, would freeze.
But I’m a rat who pulls a lever
To get a piece of cheese.
Filed under Poems
If I were a mayfly
With but one day to live
I’d spend my only hours
Looking for ways to give,
And what better gift
Is there for a bunch of bugs
But a lifetime supply of happiness
In the form of chocolate Hugs.
I would build a factory
A milimeter high.
I’d hire and train the larvae
To work until they die.
I’d create a one-fly empire
To bring joy to me and you,
Only to have it crushed
By some human’s canoe.
So next time you are boating,
Running, swimming, or taking a hike
Think about the little guys
Before doing as you like,
‘Cause maybe the cure for cancer
Or diseases of another kind
Are hidden in the ephemeral
Ambitious mayfly’s mind.
If I were a Mayfly
I’d be the best fly I could be.
But alas, I’m not a fly,
So let’s go watch TV.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 