I want you
Like vegan bacon,
Like rain on my birthday,
Like my car being towed.
I want you
Like an unreleased kraken,
Like a giant pet termite
Or a poisonous toad.
I want you
Like an IRS audit,
Like Buffy wanted
A vampire to slay.
Some might hate this poem
But I know you applaud it.
My wants may be wonky
But you like it that way.
The Daily Travesty 