Tag Archives: Multiple

What The Flock?

The best men in America

All come from Arkansas.

They’re peacocks in the city

And turkeys in the straw.


“A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush”

Is really a load of bull…

When there’s no meat on the table for dinner

Nobody’s like “But the bushes are full!”


Some say Bird Jesus is a parrot

‘Cause he always has something to say.

I personally disagree because

Bird Jesus is a bird of pray.


The woods were dark and silent

And our hunting trip did fail.

My wife said the woods were empty

But I just think the birds were male.

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Three Wholesome Jokes (Almost)

He started as a humble sponge

Used to being ignored.

Then he got famous, his ego grew,

And he became self-absorbed.


I picked up a hitchhiking balloon

Who was waiting at a bus stop.

I asked what sort of music he liked;

He said “Anything but pop.”


My relationship: I wanted to end it.

I told my girl “I want to be independent.”

In her right jacket-pocket

She had my photo in a locket

And said “You are… in de pendant!”

…So I killed her.

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