Tag Archives: Multiple

What The Flock?

The best men in America

All come from Arkansas.

They’re peacocks in the city

And turkeys in the straw.

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“A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush”

Is really a load of bull…

When there’s no meat on the table for dinner

Nobody’s like “But the bushes are full!”

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Some say Bird Jesus is a parrot

‘Cause he always has something to say.

I personally disagree because

Bird Jesus is a bird of pray.

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The woods were dark and silent

And our hunting trip did fail.

My wife said the woods were empty

But I just think the birds were male.

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Three Wholesome Jokes (Almost)

He started as a humble sponge

Used to being ignored.

Then he got famous, his ego grew,

And he became self-absorbed.

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I picked up a hitchhiking balloon

Who was waiting at a bus stop.

I asked what sort of music he liked;

He said “Anything but pop.”

——————————————————–

My relationship: I wanted to end it.

I told my girl “I want to be independent.”

In her right jacket-pocket

She had my photo in a locket

And said “You are… in de pendant!”

…So I killed her.

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