Tag Archives: Stupid

But Is It Wearing A Pasta Strainer?

If you’re rude to the people

Who print drivers’ licenses

They have a pretty cool trick:

They take a photo

Of your face

But actually it’s a dick pic.

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Not The Solution We Need, But The Solution We Deserve…

Thousands of New Yorkers

Are dying every day,

Yet no one has the courage

To step on up and say

“Send every smart-mouthed teenager

“Some radioactive Purell.”

We could have superheroes by now

But the government says “Oh well…”

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I Was So Upset, I Didn’t Even Write the Next 2.5 Stanzas!

A man sold me some wood the other day.

He said “This is the best you’ll ever get.”

But when I set the wood on fire I saw

Cars painted on the sides, and knew ’twas shit.

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Sick Jokes Man!

Unlike aids, ebola, and most cancers of the spleen

People make a lot of jokes about Covid-19.

Maybe if we isolated people with a tumor

We’d find the situation full of all new types of humor?

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Keeping Your Head Above Water

I bought a fish named Clem on Tuesday

And by Wednesday he was dead.

I bought a fish named Joe on Thursday

But hid him under my bed.

Joe is living happily

Unlike poor, stubborn Clem

Who saw guys on TV and challenged himself

To hold his breath like them.

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Wardrobe Malfunction

Yesterday I was responsible:

Got dressed, and went to work.

Just ’cause I mixed the order up

Doesn’t mean I’m a jerk…

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How To Offend Everyone In Eight Lines Or Less

She drove like she was asian.

She swam like she was black.

She jumped like a caucasian

With a dolphin on her back.

She wasn’t good at anything;

If she tried, she’d fail

But she was still ten-times better

Than every straight white male.

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