Tag Archives: Short

Legolas and Pitiless

There are lots of similarities

Between Epstein and Tolkien’s elves:

Both hang around with youngsters

And neither of them kill themselves.

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The Model Meets The Gamer

I’m young and very beautiful

As you can clearly see,

And so I guess you’re losing sleep

So oft you think of me?

It’s true that you are beautiful,

It’s true that you are young,

But I think of you as often

As the flavor of my tongue.

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When You’re Not Sure Who To Offend…

At the 5K Run for white power

People called me “Hitler” to my face.

I disagreed with them, explaining

“Unlike Hitler, I can finish a race.”

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Bless Me Son, For I Done Sinned

A while ago I wrote a poem

About how to be your own son.

Recently, through Jesus,

I wrote another one:

If you are a grandfather

Of your son’s male offspring

I’m happy to report that you

Can do an exciting thing…

If your son joins the clergy

As a Presbyterian

And you go to his church

Your grandkid is your Father’s son.

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How Dare I?

I don’t think it’s funny

And I don’t think it’s strange

To have autistic teenagers

Opposing climate change.

I find it quite the opposite,

A much welcomed relief

To show that neurotypicals

Need not hold their belief.

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Just Pause For A Second…

The difference between a joke

And a poem’s not the rhyming;

A poem’s funny if it’s true,

But why’s a joke funny timing.

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Wallace and Gromit

It’s truly not a hoax

That there are only two types of folks:

Those who think Wensleydale is cracking

And those whose education is lacking.

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