Tag Archives: Joke

My High School Love Life

The car windows are steamy.

My chest is warm and bare.

My fingers tingle, running

Gently through her golden hair.

Her chin is in my fingers

And I pull her lips to mine.

Our tongues do dance a tango

That defines the word divine.

I pause, she gasps and whimpers

But I say “I’ll be back soon.”

I step into the parking lot

Beneath the crescent moon.

I can read “humane society”

Despite the evening fog.

I tell the clerk “I’ll take her,”

And that’s how I met my dog.

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Now There’s A Joke!

Golf

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I Stole These Jokes And Made Them Rhyme… You’re Welcome

A Mexican magician

Was the epitome of grace.

He would count “uno, dos,”

Then disappear without a tres.

He did this trick in Europe.

When he reappeared he said “mama mia!”

Then he asked “can you see me now?”

And the crowd said: “Yes, oui, si, ja.” 

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Pokemon

A pyromaniacal lizard,

A grand aquatic turtle,

A plant-infested dinosaur

Walk into a bar.

Some ten-yeard-olds

Go on a quest with them.

It’s worked out well so far.

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Not Your Average Blackbirds

Three grey crows

Walk into a bar

Where liberals make jokes

About how white they are.

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This Poem Is As Funny As You Are

Why did the [subject]

[action in past-tense]?

Because [satisfying irony],

But that’s just my two cents.

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After the Rave

What is orange

And six feet tall

And smells like it is dead?

This isn’t a joke.

I’m asking you

Because one is in my bed.

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