Tag Archives: Birds

Audubon Abbreviated

A group of owls is a congress,

A group of crows, a murder.

Anything else just call a flock

And you’ll pass as a birder.

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What’s In A Nest?

Let me show you my nest,

The place I rest my head,

Full of feathers and down,

The protection we shed.

We’ll regrow them in time.

They adorn my haven,

Nothing but sticks and mud

And a home for a raven.

My nest’s in a tree.

The tree’s made by rain.

Rain makes my wings heavy

And makes flying pain.

If the sun comes around

And then refuses to set

I’ll have no tree or nest,

So I pray to be wet.

Bugs and worms fill me up

So I may keep eggs warm

So my nest will be full

With a small raven swarm

Who complain of the rain

And fear losing a feather

And I don’t mind their kind

And I treasure “together.”

Soon they’ll be showing

A tree with their nest

And “together” is gone

And it’s all for the best.

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Typical Bird Answer…

A young male eagle was hunting

And swooped down on a dove.

He asked his girl, “What now?”

And his girl squawked, “Eat prey, love.”

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The Purpose of a Bird

What is the purpose of a bird?

To fly? To eat? To breed?

Is its life a thing of choice

Or else of merely need?

If its purpose is to fly

But, hatching from its shell

Is born without the wings to fly

Can life be ever well?

If its purpose is to eat

But lacking seed or prey

Can the bird starve nobly

As nature has its way?

If its purpose is to breed

But has no living mate

Is the bird worthwhile still

Despite its desperate fate?

And what of birds within their egg

Afraid to face the light

For fear of life without a mate

Or lack of food or flight,

Who lay inside their egg, so warm,

Who never hurt or cry?

Are they blessed who never live

For they shall never die?

What is the purpose of a bird

Who cannot do a thing?

To live in stillness silently

Or else, perhaps, to sing.

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What The Flock?

The best men in America

All come from Arkansas.

They’re peacocks in the city

And turkeys in the straw.


“A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush”

Is really a load of bull…

When there’s no meat on the table for dinner

Nobody’s like “But the bushes are full!”


Some say Bird Jesus is a parrot

‘Cause he always has something to say.

I personally disagree because

Bird Jesus is a bird of pray.


The woods were dark and silent

And our hunting trip did fail.

My wife said the woods were empty

But I just think the birds were male.

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Hidden In Plain Sight

I am the bird who built her nest

Beside the onramp to I5.

On the road mens’ eyes are glued

As they drive to their servitude.

Millions see me every day

But almost none will notice.

They lose the chance to look at me

Because they have somewhere to be.

I eat a bug and flap my wings

And smell fresh air and gasoline.

They think they need the Earth and Sky

And long for what they cannot buy.

They can fly to planets

I’ll never know exist,

Yet I don’t mind my being small.

I am the freest of them all.

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What Fruits The Idle Mind Hath Yielded This Morn

If birds ate at restaurants

I imagine KFC

Would be a lot more popular.

The reason might just be

That folks would eat at restaurants

Where birds would frequent less.

You might think that’s racist

But that’s my fairest guess.

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Not Your Average Blackbirds

Three grey crows

Walk into a bar

Where liberals make jokes

About how white they are.

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Good Bye ‘Til Next Year, With Artificial Birds

Rubber chicken,

Plastic duck.

The year is over;

That’s just our luck.

Ceramic peacock,

Wooden goose.

Next year is nigh

So I must vamoose. 

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Racial PSA

Some claim my speech invalid

Because my skin is pallid.

Some think you can’t be right

If your skin blends into night.

But what we all agree upon

Be we dark or pale

Is that we’re superior to

The common goose or quail.

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