Tag Archives: Psychic

But I Didn’t, So She Lied, So I Asked For My Money Back And Now I’m Absolutely Convinced That Spirits Exist

I go to a fortune teller

And give her fifteen dollars

And she pulls out a deck of cards

And makes some scary hollers

Then stares me in the eye and says

“I looked into the black

“And in about one minute

“You’ll ask for your money back.”

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I Like An Easy Read

I’ve discovered I’m a psychic.

It’s really pretty slick!

If found out when my lover

Thought “I hope he’s not psychic.”

Well that relationship

Ended on an ironic note

When I shouted “ha ha, I am!”

And that was all she wrote…

Being a psychic in the dating pool

Is fun, to say the least.

I know which gal’s have hearts of gold

And which have infected yeast.

Now the mind of every man

Is a delightfully simple thing,

Like Indiana Jones

And the temple of “do I buy a ring?”

A woman’s mind is more complex

Like the tale of War and Peace

But from an eagle’s point of view

And written in Taiwanese.

I’ve gotten used to psychic life

And find a girl I may,

But when it comes to reading minds

I think I’m kinda gay.

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