Tag Archives: Teens

April 16, 2023 · 7:10 pm

Not What I wanted To Hear My Teenager Saying…

If I had a roll of nickels

For every driver’s-ed I didn’t learn

I could make bus drivers angry

‘Til the dinosaurs return…

When people looked for Spartacus

For why-ever the heck they did

And all the Roman peasants

Done got the real Spartacus hid

And all of them were saying

“I’m Spartacus!” When they weren’t

I hope some guy was like “I’m Dave!”

And then he got, like, spurn’t.

I live a life of luxury,

Amidst my massive family.

They rub and brush my golden hair,

And I reward them with “I don’t care.”

I have three hobbies. These are they:

On your freshly vacuumed chair I lay,

Peeing on your lovely walls,

And playing with my hairy balls.

You say you love me. Who knows why?

You’ll probably outlive me (heavy sigh).

Having me is lots of fun.

Forever yours, your teenage son.