I’ll tell you a tale of a terror
Of a fellow whose job starts with “C”.
He sold silly stuff, but it wasn’t enough
To make “millionaire” start with a “B”.
So it would seem that he dreamed up a scheme
Where whenever one wanted to win
They could wait for an hour to double their power
Or just pay not to wait to begin.
From there they’d enable the financially stable
To get, just a bit at a time,
A pack of fine hats that add one to your stats
For eleventy-one gems and a dime.
I’m not sure which curse is objectively worse:
The fact that they dreamed up this plan
Or that players will buy ‘til the debt hits their eye
For a chance at a doodad in tan.
And yet player one wants a gun that’s more fun
And mom’s credit card’s been pre-approved…
Or how about trying to stop all our buying
Until C-level guy gets removed?