Tag Archives: Truth

A Male Perspective

Your presence is like ice cream

Eaten with a wooden spoon

While a puppy sits upon my lap

Some Sunday afternoon.

Your voice is like a raindrop

After seven years of drought.

I’m acting like a macho dude

For fear that you’ll find out.


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Fade To Black

To the victor go the spoils,

The diamonds and the oils,

The right to raise a flag above

A world that’s not their own.

To the losers, the defeated,

Goes an anger ever-heated,

Simmering for generations

Within each descendant’s bone.

To the watchers, the supporters,

Pulling strings and giving orders

Goes a power of oppression

And, with it, endless pain.

To the peaceful, to the no one,

Goes the best life in the long run,

Remembered in the darkness

Which always will remain.

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Season 8

Roses are red.

Violets are blue.

I put as much effort into this poem

As the Game of Thrones writers would’ve.

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If They Spot An Oddity They’ll Start Feeling Audity And You’ll Be An Auditee

Thanks for calling IRS

We’re pleased to take your call.

We’ll be with you shortly

In almost no time at all.

Today’s call volume’s low

So you’ll likely only wait

Until the next December

Or the climax of your fate.

In the meantime please relax

And find something to do.

Our agents are quite busy

Making life feel hard for you.

We would like to help you

And help we probably could

But, by law, we are forbidden

To do anything good.

We know you are unhappy

And we know we’ve caused you stress.

Here’s some tax-funded Muzak.

Thanks for calling IRS.

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Back Me Up, Caitlyn

I don’t call you “sir” ’cause I hate you.

I don’t call you “ma’am” to be a bigot.

I use words 99.4 percent of people

Will prefer to be called. Can you dig it?

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My Attempt At Humanism Before I Interact With The Public Today

If you weigh 400 pounds

And sit beside me on a plane

I do not hate you as a person

But I still think you’re a pain.

If you say “fuck” like girls say “like”

And I am with my 6-year-old

I do not hate you as a person

But I hope you die before you’re old.

If you blast rap at 1:00 AM

And I wake up for work at 5:00

I do not hate you as a person

But I do wish you were not alive.

If you recast my favorite film

And the final movie turns out bad

I do not hate the cast or crew

But the fact remains I feel sad,

So if my feeling isn’t yours

‘Cause you are you and I am me

It doesn’t mean I hate your guts;

I dislike you with empathy.

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When You Spend Mauritanian Money To Play A Gregorian Cadence On A Welsh Instrument (And No One Will Play Board Games With You Anymore)

I spent lots of oguiya

To buy a crwths

So I could perform a euouae.

If you think this is nonsense

But I know better…

I’ve read the Scrabble dictionary. Hooray!

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