I’ve done a bit of research
In a casual sort of way
And I noticed quite a pattern
In the things I’ve got to say.
If I write a poem
About my lack of motivation
After weeks of doing lots
It gets a digital standing ovation.
If instead my lazy poems
Come two right in a row
You tell me what “a pair” is
And that it’s something I should grow.
What I’ve concluded from this study
Of a couple offhand posts
Is that all is fine and dandy
With parodies and roasts
But when I’m being honest
With my slothful true demeanor
You fail to appreciate
How the browner grass is greener.
The stanza which precedes this one
May not make sense to you.
I don’t get it either
So I’ll tell you what we’ll do:
Go ahead and “like” this poem.
Go and comment and subscribe.
Share it, tweet it, email it,
And show it’s how you gibe!
Now when you disobey me
And this poem gets zero “likes”
I can get off my high horse
And quit downing Mike and Ikes
And maybe in the future
I’ll come to realize
That writing better mediocrity
Has value in your eyes.