Tag Archives: Mimes

One Thing Most Of You Will Never Have To Worry About

If you’re ever taking a walk

And you’re an amateur mime named Jean-Jacques

You’d be an unlucky bloke

If you had a stroke

But oh, how the viewers would talk!

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This Is The Crap I Write At 11:20

The little box on my watch

That tells me the date

Is taunting me with

What might have been my fate,
For it says “23,”

But it’s halfway away

Towards the “24” sign

That means it’s the next day.
I think I’m in meltdown,

To have my mind be so blank

For two days in a week.

I have job security to thank.
And for those East of Cali,

Who missed today’s rhymes:

If I could I’d email you

A cage full of mimes.


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The Art Of Heisting

I saw a priceless piece of art

Hanging on your wall.

I dug a slit beneath it

Into which it could fall.

I shook the house forcefully

With a wrecking ball,

And now to find the painting,

Through rubble I must crawl.
It seemed a good idea

For thieving at the time.

Your house was so unguarded

And perfect for a crime,

And the painting was so beautiful

It’d sell for quite a dime.

Alas, my plan was vetted

By an unreliable mime.
So because of my planner’s silence

I made a lot if noise

With the pretense of stealing

Your super pretty toys.

I hope I’ll find a better partner

Among the orange-jumpsuited boys.

Ah, the art of heisting

And all its simple joys.

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