What if there were a fairy tale
In which a handsome knight
Went off to save a princess
On his steed of pearly white
But when he leaned to kiss her
And woke her from her sleep
She turned into a zombie
And ate the patriarchal creep?
Tag Archives: Rape Culture
…of Wrath?
You may not think it’s fine
To live life as a mulcher
At a vineyard, but don’t whine
Just ’cause you’re part of grape culture.
Filed under Poems
Tickle Culture
You’re a bad human being,
Not because of what you do,
But because you have fingers.
I’ll prove it to you.
But first a few facts
From an uncited source:
Sixty percent of ticklish marriages
End in divorce.
If that’s not enough,
Let the record show
Ninety-nine percent of victims
Are tickled by someone they know.
Just because you don’t tickle
Doesn’t wash you of guilt.
Look around? Don’t you see
The tickle culture you’ve built.
But after writing this
Everything stays the same.
All I’m seeking to do
Is impose fear and shame.
If I succeeded,
I am one happy elf.
If I didn’t, you’re evil.
Go tickle yourself.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 