Tag Archives: Puns

Bless Me Son, For I Done Sinned

A while ago I wrote a poem

About how to be your own son.

Recently, through Jesus,

I wrote another one:

If you are a grandfather

Of your son’s male offspring

I’m happy to report that you

Can do an exciting thing…

If your son joins the clergy

As a Presbyterian

And you go to his church

Your grandkid is your Father’s son.

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When You Break Up / Lines In A Poem / So It Looks Longer / Than It Really / Is

Warlords might not be

The sensitive type,

Not ones to use shampoo

Or lotions,

But they’re a lot better

Than pacifists

Who are racist

Against certain oceans.

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A Oui Problem…

When I discovered my gender-neutral parent

Was not my biological dad

I realized it was quite the faux pa.

Yes, this poem is bad.

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Extremely Forced Naughty Jokes Are Tight!

It might mean very different things

When I say to my girlfriend

“I still can’t understand you,”

Followed by: “Come again?”

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They Called It “Animal Control Headquarters”

I went to the zoo.

There was only one dog there.

It was a shih tzu.

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Why I’m Not A P.I.

If you try to stalk someone

And eventually fail

It would be worth your time

To work some retail.

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Spa Ha Ha

I asked how much it costs

To get one’s pubic region waxed.

They said “A Brazilian dollars,”

At which point I relaxed.

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