Dr. Pepper was hit by an iron
He recently confessed.
When asked how he was feeling
He said “I’m soda pressed.”
Tag Archives: Puns
Typical Bird Answer…
A young male eagle was hunting
And swooped down on a dove.
He asked his girl, “What now?”
And his girl squawked, “Eat prey, love.”
Filed under Poems
Do I *Detect* A Garment That Doesn’t Fit… That’s Unsuitable
Geico has a gecko,
Aflac has a duck,
But my insurance company
Has no such mascot luck,
So instead of selling policies
I’ll be a stock-market trader
With a well-dressed crocodile mascot
Called the Investi-Gator.
Filed under Poems
When You Stretch For The Pun And Hurt Yourself
I want what a former president may do
Were he a bird who saw a speck
‘Cause I don’t like the words “and a.”
I want a Bush’ll peck.
Filed under Poems
One Trapdoor Mishap Later…
I went through a stage when I was an actor.
I think the hole in the floor was a factor.
The said “Break a leg,” so I did obey.
Now I have my own cast I don’t have to pay!
Filed under Poems
The Heroes We Need
The closest of friends
Were Buttock and Cheek.
One was quite hairy,
The other quite sleek.
Whenever the world
Seemed wrong for a bit
The two came together
And stopped all that shit!
Filed under Poems
OI?
Someone told me
R*pe jokes aren’t funny.
I said, “You’re right, they’re knot.”
The time wasn’t ripe
To leave anyone hanging,
So I used a different * than they thought.
Filed under Poems
Is This Too White, I Wonder ™?
Body and bread,
Sword and sheaf;
Stalk of muscle,
Blade of leaf;
Sweet or sour,
Baked or no;
It rises within us:
Tae Kwon Dough!
Filed under Poems
Low Siento…
Somewhere, there’s a Mexican wizard
Who can’t hear what people say.
I’ve heard he’s a deaf supremacist
And a member of the “Que? Que? Que?”
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 