Tag Archives: Blues

I Tried To Write A Blues Song…

If the fact that night’s black

Somehow strikes you as racist,

If you’ve slacked off on the lotion

And your skin has a cray cyst,

If you drink green smoothies

And fly “coexist” kites

You may not have the blues

But you’ve sure got the whites.

When your three-year-old son

Tells you “Daddy, I’m gay”

And your instagram buddies

Say “Hashtag-OMG-yay!”

If you’re upset you don’t need

To fight for your rights

Then I’m sorry my friend

But you may have the whites.

If Samuel L. Jackson’s

Your “number one bro,”

You think its fine to say “moron”

But not to call someone “slow,”

If you think the dragon’s

Misunderstood by the knights

Then give your friends sunglasses

‘Cause you’ve got the whites.

But if you’ve got the whites

There’s no need to be sad.

It’s not your fault your existence

Makes everything bad.

One day we won’t judge people

Based on sex, race, or fat…

If only all the fat rich white males

Could understand that!


Filed under Lyrics, Poems

A New Rainbow Awakens

I’m feeling kinda down

Like a king without a crown.

I’m cowardly, as yellow as they come.

I’ve read like half a million books

By a bunch of chefs and cooks

But about sustainability I’m still dumb.

I thought maybe I’d fit in

If I changed my skin

But this spray-tan makes me look like that guy on the news.

You put it all together

In the rain or sunny weather…

I’ve got the well-read, not-green, yellow, orangey-white guy blues.

Leave a comment

Filed under Poems

Keep the Baby Blues

Well the supreme court
Made an unpopular decision,
At least for those whose disposition
Is decidedly pro-choice.
But Baby, I’m here
To let you know no need to bother,
‘Cause your probably not the father
Of my up-and-coming boys.

But if you can’t sleep
‘Cause of that night you slept around,
Well good news, you dirty hound!
I’ve a solution to use.
No need to find
Some shady dark alley clinics
Run by Obama-care critics.
Just sing the “keep the baby” blues.

You might just find that fatherhood
Is just what you should.
Might be surprisingly good.
Yea, you might just find that having boys
Is not all about the noise
And spending money on toys.

Look on the bright side:
You have to pay for birth control
Which feels good deep in your soul,
Or so the justices said.
And better yet
If feds won’t pay to kill a baby
Then it might just be that maybe
Fewer babies be dead.

You might just find being a mum
Is very joyous to some,
Even if Daddy’s a bum.
You might just find the will to love
Though maybe that epiphany don’t come from heaven above.

Liberal friends, they did defeat us,
But their intent wasn’t simply to beat us,
They was only try’n to save another fetus,
Who just might be a future baby Cletus.

And so I end
With this proposal to ponder:
Would our hopes go way out yonder
If you did abstinence choose?
And I’ll admit
If that’s a price too high to pay
Then live your life the same way
And sing the “keep the baby” blues.

Leave a comment

Filed under Songs