I’d like to think
Love is a choice,
And the product of
An adoring mind.
I’d like to think
It’s a little voice
That reminds you
To be gentle and kind.
Yet who we love
Is often chosen
By hormones
Running free.
So I hope you find
A place in your adrenals
And save it
Just for me.
Filed under Poems
I went to the proving grounds
Hoping to test my mettle,
But when I was done I found
That I lost and had to settle.
I thought my strength was notable,
And my skill substantial,
But I forgot it was a proving ground
And my evidence was circumstantial.
Filed under Poems
“Every kiss begins with Kay:”
It’s catchy, but untrue.
I know kisses that begin with “Hey,”
With silence, or “I love you.”
Where the sales pitch is excellent
And really makes the cut
Is in the case of all those kisses
That end with “Kay, now what?”
Filed under Poems
I for one like global warming.
Who wouldn’t mind extra Summer?
I guess at first in New Orleans
The flooding would be a bummer,
But all that would be rectified
When Santa relocates there
With his team of penguin helpers
And his red-nosed polar bear.
No longer are there jingle bells,
But strings of plastic beads.
Some zydeco Christmas Carols
Are what this country needs,
So drive your hummers and SUV’s
And feed beans to your cows.
I’ve enjoyed sharing my wisdom,
But now I’ve got some rabble to rouse.
Filed under Poems
Corn stalks and lonely days
Spending my life
Walking in circles.
If only…
If only I’d paid attention
To where I came from.
If only I knew where I was.
If only I’d believed in society
When they told me
“The corn maze closes at noon.”
Corn stalks and lonely days
Walking in circles.
I hope it’s only my stomach growling.
Filed under Poems
There’s a little voice inside
That will tell you to run and hide,
Endeavor to crush you
With the weight of all your dreams.
But you have an even smaller voice
That offers you a better choice:
To accept that crushing weight
Is lighter than it seems.
And a little deeper still
Is the diminutive voice of will
That cheers you on
To the land of milk and honey
And one final voice so small
You can’t hear it at all,
But it whispers
“Fart jokes are still funny.”
Filed under Poems
I broke my all time record
In the 100 meter dash.
I was a wild jungle cat,
And faster than the flash,
And yet I came in second place
‘Cause I misunderstood the rules.
That’s why I ran a 5K
In a minute thirty-two.
Filed under Poems
I can think of many reasons
That Friday is the king of days.
It comes before the weekend,
Which are the only better days.
But if every day were Friday,
Then weekends would never come,
And if every day were Saturday
We’d only work weekends, which is dumb.
If every day were Friday
We’d just have to call it “day.”
Perhaps the week is fine
In its own obnoxious way.
Filed under Poems
Most people I know are selfish;
Not greedy, just focused on “me.”
What they don’t understand is the concept
That there are other fish in the sea.
Moreover they try to persuade
By saying “this would help me a lot.”
But unless you’re in love or in debt
Help the other guy, your thing does not.
So think when you ask for a favor
“What is in it for them.”
It will deflate tour head for a while,
And from small heads do all good things stem.
*This absolutely is.
This day, 60 years ago
My dearest Mom was born,
Her infant eyes already wise,
Her heart devoid of scorn.
She gazed upon the world
And I know just what she thinkt:
“I hope these fantastic dinosaurs
Will never go extinct.”
16 years later was her first job
Bottling wine and building pyramids.
She’s had a lot of jobs since then
(You might say she’s had myriads).
A smaller number of years ago,
(Precisely 23),
My mother gave birth to the warmup kid
Who she had three years before me.
And when I was born, her lengthy life
Was instantly fulfilled.
I love you ma, and T-Rex agrees,
Even though by a meteor he was killed.
Filed under Poems
