If you use YouTube
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Just retire now.
Tag Archives: Old People
Nursing Home Rhymes
I’ve got dandruff on my shins…
That’s not where it goes!
Know I need some Head and Shoulders
For between my knees and toes.
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To get 8 hours of sleep at night
I do whatever it takes,
By which I mean taking 10-minute naps
Between my bathroom breaks.
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Twinkle twinkle little star
Way above my little car,
Shining in my optic nerve
Making me violently swerve.
Twinkle twinkle little star
On the badge of officer Barr.
I sang him “YMCA.”
Why’d he take my license away?
Twinkle twinkle little star…
Crap, I left my teeth in the car!
Filed under Poems
My Coming Out As Trans-Elderly
Thirty-seven dollars in nickels
Rolled into neat little stacks:
I’ll use them to buy some dill pickles
To eat for my mid-morning snacks.
I’ve got a compulsion to do this,
Though no logic yet as to why.
Perhaps I just want the grocers
To think of me as “that guy.”
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 