The big bad wolf went down to the coop
Where the farmer said “There’s 38 genders.”
The wolf ain’t ate no chickens so far
But he ate the chicken tenders.
Tag Archives: Chicken
Why Your Meat Choice Matters
For every chicken they kill
To sell at the store
When apocalypse comes
That’s one skeleton more.
For every boneless chicken
You bring home to roast
When apocalypse comes
That’s just one more ghost.
Filed under Poems
Were Their Deaths For Nothing?!
Many chickens died today
To feed both me and you.
That makes me feel a little bad
For cooking turkey stew.
Filed under Poems
What Happened To The Elder Gods, Vol. 1
A chicken divine
Made entirely of gold
With a mind to cure cancer
And which never gets old
That makes a girl fall in love
And a man squeal like a dork
Looks as lovely as can be
As I stab it with my fork.
Filed under Poems
I Am Chicken
I am chicken:
Hear me roar.
Feeding me
Is a daily chore.
Every fancy
Meat you see
Tastes exactly
Just like me.
I am chicken
With great legs.
I’m a prolific donor
Of my eggs.
Which came first
I cannot say,
But people ask me
Every day.
I am chicken,
But do not scoff:
I can outrun you
With my head cut off.
Call me cowardly
And you’ll have strife indeed.
You’ll awake to my call
And be paid with my feed.
Filed under Poems
What If
What if chickens had no wings
And skin instead of feathers
And human legs and feet and heads
And wore clothing made from leather?
What if chickens were actually humans
But disguised as mindless poultry?
I don’t know what my conclusion is,
But I hope it’s something sultry.
Filed under Poems
The Stuff of Gods
Zeus likes keeping animals
Behind enclosure walls.
Ares is the God of war,
And busts a lot of balls.
Uranus is an deity
Who you can always say is yours,
And when the thunder God gets chicken pox
He becomes covered in Thors.
Muslims think that poultry
Is an animal about which to sing,
Because they worship Allah,
And with chicken Allah’s king.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 