Tag Archives: Logic

To Infinity… And Beyond

Here’s the latest quandary

That kept me up all night:

I thought I was bad at self-evaluation

And it turns out I was right…

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The News Be Like…

It is a fact from an incited source

That 30 percent of collisions

Are the result of someone driving drunk;

In other words, poor decisions.

That means that 70 percent

Of sober drivers crash.

Driving without drinking

Is, according to statistic, rash.

That fact, if analyzed in depth

Means that driving sober will

Increase your chances by 133%

That, by driving, you will kill.

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Correlation and Causation

The caged hamster

Lays no eggs.

Imprisoned gators

Give no milk.

Detained cobras

Have no legs.

Subjugated silkworms

Yield no silk,

Yet free-range chickens

Lay eggs daily.

Fence-free cows

Give endless cream.

Freedom lets you

Go through life gaily,

So free the hamsters and reptiles

And we’ll live the dream!

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Why You Should Avoid Furries

Han was fine and dandy

Until Chewbacca came along

And made the “Solo” surname

Both illogical and wrong.

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All Mips Are Mops, and Some Moos are Maps…

The squeaky wheel gets the grease:

If we know this is real

Then I can logically conclude

My hair is a squeaky wheel.

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