Tag Archives: Math

But How Many Decimal Places?

I once knew a shepherd named Sadie

Whose business was just a touch shady.

She had 79 sheep

When she went to sleep

Then she rounded them up and had 80.

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Math Meets Meth

They said “Name every number.”

I said “Paul.”

They couldn’t refute my argument

And, thus, that was all.

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Bob Dylan, Social Justice, and Math

Take the number of roads

A man must walk down

Before he can be called a man,

Then multiply that by negative 1

And you have the number of roads you need walk to be called trans.

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When Parents Use Your Full Name

I was not prepared

For how badly I’d be scared

When mom called “a^2 + 2ab

“+b^2, come here to me.”

FYI, my name’s (a+b)^2

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Why Not .03 Per Cent? FALSE ADVERTISING!!!

Today I saw one per cent milk

And so I gave my mom a holler.

Turns it it’s just crappy milk,

Not 100 milks for a dollar.

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58008 is the new 90210

More men than women study math,

Professionally at least.

This is true from North to South

And also West to East.

It’s not because women are dumb

Or men like math by fate…

It’s that all boys love what happens

When you invert 7,251×8.

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$ = q * ($/q)

I went to the science store

To buy subatomic particles.

It’s something I discovered

Reading “Modern Physics” articles.

They sold protons and electrons in

Small, medium, and large

But they just gave away the neutrons

Completely free of charge.

Bonus humor if you can prove how the title is fallacious.

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