I was sitting by myself
When, as if from out of thin air,
A nymph straight from my fantasies
Asked “Is anyone sitting there?”
I smiled as well as a man can smile
When faced with an 11/10
And said “It’s free.” She said “Lovely!”
Then gave it to her friend.
If I were a trilobite
I’d be very lonely.
I’d go on trilodate.com
But I’d find myself only.
I’d be alone through every night
And have very little fun.
But I realize I don’t know what I trilobite is
And also that I just might be one.
They say I’ve a nose like a bloodhound,
Eyes of an eagle, ears of an elf.
That’s a polite way for people to say
I suck at hide-and-seek when I play by myself.