Tag Archives: Stories

I Heard It Through The Bovine

Ferdinand was a peaceful bull

And we all cherish his story,

But why can’t we give other bulls

Their fair share of the glory?

Just ‘cause bulls are big and strong

And make their targets gory

Doesn’t mean we all should be deprived

Of the tales of Bloody Cory.

Cory was a little bull

But with a giant’s rage.

They say he killed a hundred clowns

Before he left his cage

But the idiots in power

Who control the ratings gauge

Decided Cory’s story

Wasn’t for the those of younger age.

The older audiences

Would have loved our vicious bull

On a silver screen starring Charlie Sheen

With songs by Jethro Tull,

But the studios made their sequels

And Cory’s script execs did pull

And little Cory’s path to glory

Was rendered void and null.

But you, dear reader, have a gift:

A peek into the truth,

The knowledge of a future steer

In his ungodly youth

And if you eat a steak tonight

With a glass of vermouth

I hope you think of Cory

And his doings so uncouth.

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The Hero’s Journey

There was a reluctant young hero

Whose number of close friends was zero.

An old mentor said “Hey,

“Want to come save the day?”

Kid agreed, and the whole world did cheer-o.

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Prudence

There are two sides

To every tale.

One person might think

They saw a whale,

While others agree

The first guy lied

And it was just

Someone’s backside.

What’s fire to one

Is ice to the next,

Some like to call

And others text,

But one answer

Will never fail:

If your wife asks “how’s this dress”

Do not say “hey look, a whale!”

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The Zero-Story Building

It was built in the city

In a space it didn’t fit.

It was never used or looked at.

That’s all there is to it.

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