There once was a popular band
Whose singer was pretty but bland.
The sales started to fall
Until for one and all
She showed off a mammary gland.
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Tag Archives: Limerick
But It Makes One Bicep Look Bigger…
Some of you may believe
That I wear my heart on my sleeve
As a matter of choice,
But don’t heed that voice.
There was a surgeon who’s since taken his leave…
Filed under Poems
An American In Paris
When walking les rues de Paris
I see people looking at me.
They laugh, “hua hua hua!”
At je ne sais quoi
And, like any sane person, I flee.
Filed under Poems
An Actual Retirement Home On My Street
No matter how I’ve managed to sin
Since my life, long ago, did begin
Please forgive me enough
(Even take all my stuff),
Just don’t leave me at the Woodway Inn!
#RetiredPeopleDon’tDropSoap
Filed under Poems
How To Make French Toast?
Could somebody help me, perchance?
I’m vacationing somewhere in France
And my most gracious host
Asked to make them a toast
But objected when the eggs and cream got on their pants…
Filed under Poems
In Hindsight, Not A Guy To Cross
Jesus’s phone rang, and so he asked “who dis?”
The voice told him “my name is Judas.”
Looking back on it now
Jesus needn’t’ve said “ow”
If right then he had fled to Barbudas.
Also, I Seem To Be Getting Smaller…
I look like a million bucks
Which really, REALLY sucks:
I’m paper thin
With off-green skin
And my value’s always in flux.
Filed under Poems
