Tag Archives: Limerick

It Was A Valiant Effort At Least…

There once was a poet I knew

Who wrote poems at 11:52.

Tonight he was inspired

To write before he got tired

But, alas, tonight’s poem sucks too…

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By Reading This Limerick You May Or May Not Open A Parallel Universe

There once was a cat of Schrodinger

Who wanted to give science the finger.

He said “I will stay

“And also walk away.”

Thus he simultaneously did and did not linger.

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OMG Dad, Why Can’t You Understand Vulture Is A Student Of The World?

Their wonce was amen from Bolder

Hoo new mai dotter end tolled hurr

“Eye a door ewe, Amanda

“‘Cause u un-derstanneduh

“Spelling sin the I of de beholdre.”

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A New Study Finds All This Began In 1960 When A Straight White Man Refused To Get Vaccinated

The average guy is a virgin.

The average girl is a hoe.

You can get a college degree

To combat toxic masculinity…

How’d we get here? I don’t know.

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Hirsute, But Not Her Suitable

There once was a man from St. Mary

Who’d be merry to marry Merry Mary.

Merry Mary, however,

Did forthrightly endeavor

Never ever to wed one so hairy.

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I wrote this at 8:00 AM

There once was an Airbnb

That played host to none other than me.

The wifi was slow.

Will this upload? I don’t snow…

I guess given time we will see.

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Women Will Change You

There once was a man named Beyoncé

Who wanted to have a fiancee

But the girls were all like

“Why’s your name not like ‘Mike?’”

Now he goes by his middle name: Chauncey.

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[Title Redacted]

There once was a poet-slash-spy

Who was quite the mysterious guy.

He’d write the last thing he’d think

In invisible ink

.

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It’s A Joke About Thyme, But Alas, It Won’t Rhyme

There once was a guy from Scarborough

Who was fair, but not very thorough.

He made food, garnished sparsely

With sage, rosemary, and parsley

But alas, he didn’t take time enough.

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No Problem Officer… I Handled It

There once was a spider in my room

That met a most violent doom.

Other spiders said “Yahoo!

“Let’s all go there too!”

And that’s why my shotgun went boom.

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