Some people called us savages
For throwing tourists into volcanos,
Cannibalizing other tribes,
And praying to tornados.
Others called it “Indigenous culture”
Or “Mysticalism to savor.”
Now we throw those others in volcanos
To do the world a favor.
Tag Archives: Politically Incorrect
Eye See What You Did There
If you really squint
You’ll get much better at math.
Sincerely, China.
Filed under Poems
Back Online, Just In Time For Election Season?
Hantavirus ship
Proves the “New World Order” guys
Must be introverts
Filed under Poems
Maybe If We Got One Of Those Video Games The Kids Like And Put Guns In It? Have We Tried That Yet?
I’m not so concerned about politicians
With approval rates at historical lows.
Instead I’m concerned that armed rebellion
Is still unpopular, but hey, that’s how it goes.
Filed under Poems
I’m Going To Get Fired For This One…
Meritocracy
Is what happens when you give
White kids scholarships.
Filed under Poems
You Know They Type
My friend parked in the special spots
With the picture of Professor Xavier.
If he stayed, he’d get a ticket
So I became his savior.
“You’re not allowed to park there,” I said.
“It’s reserved for people with disabilities
“Like fans of foreign movies
“And those who say ‘white fragility.’”
Filed under Poems
Special Ed Games
If they say “duck” then you’re in luck.
If they say “goose” you must vamoose.
If they say “I will reduce carbon emissions”
You’re playing with future politicians.
Filed under Poems
*Sniff*
If, instead of using eugenics
To get a particular color of eye,
They bred for noses that never get stuffy
We’d think better of small-mustache guy.
Filed under Poems
Six Years Old And Already Screaming About Stuff That Doesn’t Matter
Today I taught a first-grade class
And of the 18 kids
Six were joys, six were invisible,
And six blew off their lids.
So one of three will be successful
And one in three will be cute
And one in three do nothing, but loudly
Which is just who the Feds will recruit.
Filed under Poems
Comfort or Fitness: How Will You Help Me?
If you ask my pronouns
I’ll answer with a smile.
If you tell me yours
I’ll sprint at least a mile.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 