Tag Archives: Politically Incorrect

Fairy Yales

Once upon a time

There was a tiny little rock

Who was the world’s preeminent scholar

On the early works of Bach.

The little rock was erudite

Yet its career went South

On account of probably white people

And, also, its lack of mouth.

——————————————————–

Once upon a time

A woman majored in STEM

And made millions teaching women

The ways that men were bad to them.

She could have been an engineer

And done science and stuff

But instead she told the patriarchs

She wasn’t paid enough.

Leave a comment

Filed under Poems

Microaggressions

I told my friend “good morning”

And they just said “morning” back

Which makes me wonder what I did

To deserve that sort of attack.

——————————————————–

He said “My pronoun’s potato

“Instead of he, him, and his.”

I mumbled “What isn’t a pronoun”

And he shouted “Yes, what is!”

——————————————————–

I ate dessert for breakfast

Though I don’t know how or why;

I made some scrambled eggs

But they identified as pie.

Leave a comment

Filed under Poems

And Then They Hear “Hee, Hee, Hee” And Start Screaming About Representation For Other Pronouns In The Onomatopoeia Of Laughter

California made it illegal

To discriminate based on hairstyle.

This is one of the greatest things

I’ve heard in quite a while

Because, based on liberal input,

I know that all white people are racist

And I’ve developed the ultimate strategy

For cutting my hair on that basis:

It’s illegal to bias one’s choices

For traditional hairstyles of race

Like cornrows or dreadlocks or afros

And because this is the case

I can shave my head to spell letters,

Specifically “I disagree.”

Now watch as the left calls me Hitler

And I just say “Hee, hee, hee.”

Dedicated to Helen, My Evil Stepsister 🙂

Want to suggest a poem topic? Leave a comment or email thedailytravesty@yahoo.com

Leave a comment

Filed under Poems

Tonight Both Actually Apply

Sometimes I love writing poems;

Of that there is no doubt.

But sometimes I’m like a single mom on welfare

Just tryin’ to crank another one out.

Leave a comment

Filed under Poems

Also, Just Kinda Gross

They asked me to hold up

Fermented canola, you see.

I refused the order…

Sounds like supporting rapeseed culture to me.

Leave a comment

Filed under Poems

The “Happy And You Know It” Verse That Got Me Fired

If you need special education

And can’t digest information,

If you need special education

Thump your chest!

(Thump thump thump thump…)

Leave a comment

Filed under Poems

That’s Pronounced “She-it”

Apparently my teachers were wrong

And there aren’t boys and girls.

Turns out gender is “representational,”

Or so the new story unfurls.

Seeing that sex doesn’t matter

To whether you’re he, she, or other

I think we need a singular pronoun

That applies equally to one another.

In the past we were male and female

And likewise called he or she.

Apparently the gender-neutral

Is also important, so they tell me.

So I have an unbiased option

To represent them, me, and you:

We can just say humans are SHeIt.

It has all three pronouns, and also is true!

2 Comments

Filed under Poems