Tag Archives: Politics

Different Decade, Same Crap

It’s been exactly ten years today

Since I wrote my first post here:

May 28th, the fateful day,

2012 the fateful year.

Back then people were afraid

The Mayan calendar was done

And the world would finish with it

And nobody had fun.

If they looked ahead ten years

To life in 2022

They’d try to ask the Mayans

Why they didn’t follow through.

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Coming Soon To A Kindergarten Near You

There once was a five-year-old child

Who was happy, and ran somewhat wild.

This continued unabated

Because the child wasn’t medicated

And thus several lawsuits were filed.

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But They Still Need Taxes?

“What comes up must come down”

My teacher told me with a frown,

But here’s a thing that I don’t get:

Why isn’t that true for government debt?

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Ooh… And Throw In A Twist Villain And Random One-Liners Whenever The MANY Main Characters Die But Then Come Back To Life Because Time Travel

There once was a film from the past

And people said it was a blast;

Then Hollywood said

“What if instead

“It had an (insert group here) cast?”

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Modern Presidents

There once was a democracy

Of half a billion, plus me.

The others said no,

But I said yes, so

You are my slaves. Hee hee hee.

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Assault? Blacklist Him! Sex Slavery? Let’s Let Him Slide Quietly Out Of The Public Eye (Yay Hollywood)

There once was an actor named Will

Who was punished for slapping, until

He thought “I’ll never be arrested

“If they knew I molested

“And trafficked minors for capitol hill!”

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Instead of “Happily Ever After”, Say This

In almost every fairy tale

Before Disney went woke

Someone would be destitute…

Good-looking, yes, but broke.

Someone else would come along

And always do what’s right

And the two of them would marry

And ride off into the night.

The question that arises

But that Disney still ignores

Is how “Happily ever after”

Can coexist with chores,

How princesses and monsters

And kings and queens and knights

Can say that they are happy

Despite their many fights,

That life keeps getting in their way

And still they smile on,

Breathing fire in the evening

Yet they’re safe again at dawn.

These fairy tales could have said

“And from then on the chose

“Always to be partners

“Even when they felt like foes.”

But instead, soon I suspect

Disney will say “Though rage

“Occasionally dampened their spirits,

“They were saved by a higher minimum wage.”

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This Poem Will Never Age

There once was a televised speech

Made by a corrupt human leech.

He said lots of stuff

But not nearly enough

To justify gross overreach.

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Poke Holes In This Strategy If You Can

I think all the world’s problems

Could be solved in a day if we

Just banded together to kill politicians

Whose surnames don’t end with “qz”.

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What Do We Want? Catchy Slogan! Where Do We Want Them? On Premium Cardstock!

As people protest from the East to the West

Why aren’t more onlookers suspicious

Of the motives behind the folks who sell signs?

(Or is thinking such things inauspicious?)

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