Rightful owner of
The world’s smallest violin
Wants you to cheer up
Tag Archives: Haiku
Christmas Is Gettin’ Good!
Growing up is hard.
Santa wants to make you smile.
Meet new Nuka-Sled!
Filed under Poems
I Could Just Eat You Up…
They called me the goat,
Which would be fine, except they’re
A birria chef.
Filed under Poems
Salmonella? More Like Scamonella
Eat raw cookie dough;
It’s basically sushi for
Happy chubby kids.
Filed under Poems
The New Tide Pod Challenge
Rolling office chair
Can reach 50 MPH
If you try enough.
Filed under Poems
I Present: The “Dumb Scientist” Paradox
I am very dense.
If I were an element
I’d be Osmium.
Filed under Poems
Down With That?
Sexy pillow fights
Probably aren’t as fun to watch
If you are a goose.
Filed under Poems
Eye See What You Did There
If you really squint
You’ll get much better at math.
Sincerely, China.
Filed under Poems
Romantic Evenings, Senior Edition
Starry Summer night
My love in my arms, but then
My bladder says “Boo”
Filed under Poems
When You Want To Be Sensitive But Can’t Rhyme And Only Have One Minute To Write
The first haiku was
TikTok for ancient Japan.
Ninjas loved that junk.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 