When you have to advertise
Something that everybody buys
Perhaps it would be wise
To consider how the company lies?
Tag Archives: Insurance
Or We Could Just Choose An Animal And Interrupt Your Football Game…
Back when Youtube first began
A bunch of kids created
Videos so funny that
Folks nearly suffocated.
Now, insurance companies
Pay grown-ups lots of money
To make commercial messages
Which somehow still aren’t funny.
If you want to sell me
Some insurance or the like
You should fire your writing staff
And hire some kid named Mike
‘Cause when I see an ad that says
“We’re expensive, we won’t lie
“But we’re not just corporate assholes”
That’s the moment that I’ll buy!
Filed under Poems
Insurance Be Like…
I called Permanente Kaiser
‘Cause I had pain in my incisor.
What they said seemed rather ruthless:
“Pay up or you’ll soon be toothless.”
For Those Of You Wondering…
Whether getting or giving,
As long as you’re living,
No matter how epic the thrift
It will always be true…
(Just between me and you)
Life insurance is a bad birthday gift.
Filed under Poems
The Daily Travesty 