Tag Archives: Snakes

But People With Pet Spiders…

If you have a snake for a pet

I think it’s a pretty safe bet

That you have one or two kidneys.

You thought this would end differently?

How judgmental can you get?

Leave a comment

Filed under Poems

But If It Were Traveling At 4 Miles Per Hour For 12 Minutes How Far Apart Were The Hay Bales?

Once there was some type of snake,

A cobra, asp, or adder.

Since the story’s fictional

It really doesn’t matter.

This adder, I’ve decided,

Was in a farm one day

Sliding its limbless body

Between two bales of hay.

The snake was not observant

And it failed to look both ways.

‘Twas run over by the farmer.

And thus ended its days.

So when the adder rendez-voused

With its rural malefactor

We can say the adder

Suddenly became sub-tractor.


Filed under Poems

I Just Rattled This One Off… Hope It Wasn’t Too Boa-ring!

The snake was made uncomfortable

And it gave a gasp.

You might say it experienced

A pain in the asp.

Leave a comment

Filed under Poems


You can’t get a job in gardening
If you are a snake.
Something about job history
And some Eve girl’s big mistake.

But I won’t let this prejudice
Go to my pointy head.
I’ll get a job in marketing
Or politics instead.

Leave a comment

Filed under Poems