Tag Archives: Driving

World Peace, Step One

I saw a guy driving today

Who had a sign in their back window:

“Please stay back,

“New stick shift driver.”

I’m putting that in the back window

Of every car I buy

From this day forward.

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#LookBothWays

I saw the golden headlights

Driving towards me in the rain.

I heard the tires squealing

And the brake lines shout of pain.

I smelled the burning rubber

And sensed the car careening

As I changed my Facebook status

So my life could have some meaning.

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Barely Illegal

Going twenty-eight in a twenty zone

While casting glances at his phone

With his lap belt fastened but not his shoulder

And an open bottle of water in the holder.

He drove on through a yellow light.

He flashed no signal but still turned right.

He’s of a group of scofflaws such

Who’ll break the law, but not by much.

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Disaster in Orange Grove, AKA The Justified Swerve

Two 18-wheelers,

Thirteen sedans,

Four snow-white horses,

And a biker named Hans:

That was the death toll

Today in Orange Grove

When I noticed a spider

On my leg as I drove.

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But I mean Well

I’m the type of friend

That gets called at 3:00 AM

By a buddy in a ditch

Needing someone to help them.

I’m the type of friend

Who will drive a hundred miles

At 90 miles an hour

To see tears turn into smiles.

I’m the type of friend

Who hits pedestrians

Because I do not sleep.

Yep, I’m that type of friend.

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Driving Home

Today I returned home from my vacation in Portland, OR. The following are a few poems I thought of over the six hour drive when I should have been avoiding pedestrians:


Feel free to tailgate my ass,

But the more you press, the less I gas.

The sooner I’m back

In Oregon

The sooner your drivers

I can deplore again.

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Today I returned home from my vacation in Portland, OR. The following are a few poems I thought of over the six hour drive when I should have been avoiding pedestrians:


Feel free to tailgate my ass,

But the more you press, the less I gas.

The sooner I’m back

In Oregon

The sooner your drivers

I can deplore again.

Leave a comment

Filed under Poems